Script:
EXTERIOR. MEADOW--DAY. CHARLIE THE UNICORN is sleeping in the meadow when he's JOINED by a PINK and BLUE unicorn.
Blue
Hey, Charlie. Hey, Charlie, wake up.
Pink
Yeah, Charlie. You silly sleepy-head, wake up.
Charlie
(groans) Oh, God, you guys. This is better
be pretty frickin' important. Is the meadow on fire?
Blue
No, Charlie. We found a map, to Candy Mountain, Candy Mountain, Charlie.
Pink
Yeah, Charlie, we're going to Candy Mountain. Come with us, Charlie.
Blue
Yeah, Charlie, it'll be an adventure. We're going on an adventure, Charlie.
Charlie
Yeah, Candy Mountain, right. I'm just gonna, you know, go back to sleep now.
Blue
(jumping onto Charlie's back) Noooo, Charlie. You have to come with us to Candy Mountain.
Pink
Yeah, Charlie, Candy Mountain. It's a land of sweets and joy ... and joyness.
'Charlie
Please stop bouncing on me.
Blue
(still jumping up and down on Charlie)
Candy Mountain, Charlie.
Pink
Yeah, Candy Mountain!
Charlie
Alright, fine! I'll come with you to Candy Mountain.
CUT TO:
EXT. FOREST -- DAY. Charlie, Pink and Blue walk through the forest
Blue and Pink
'singing)
Lalalala, lalalala, lalalala,(continued)
Charlie
Enough with the singing already.
Blue
Our first stop is over there, Charlie.
The trio stops by a large dark-greenish creature.
Charlie
Oh God, what is that?
Blue
It's a Liopleurodon, Charlie.
Pink
A magical Liopleurodon,
Blue
It's gonna guide our way to Candy Mountain.
Charlie
Alright, guys, you do know that there is no actual Candy Mountain, right?
Blue
Shun the non-believer.
Pink
Shhhunnn.
Blue
Shhhhhuunnnnnnn.
Charlie
Yeah.
The Liopleurodon groans.
Blue
It has spoken.
Pink
It's told us the waaaaay.
Charlie
It didn't say anything!
CUT TO:
Blue
It's just over this bridge, Charlie.
Pink
This magical bridge of hope and wonder.
' Charlie:
Is anyone else getting, like, covered in splinters? Seriously, you guys, we shouldn't be on this thing.
Blue
Charlie, Charlie, Charlie, Char--
Charlie
I'm right here! What do you want?!
Blue
We're on a bridge, Charlie.
CUT TO:
EXT. CANDY MOUTNTAIN -- DAY. Charile, Pink and Blue approach candy mounatain
Pink
We're here.
Charlie
Well, what do you know? There actually is a Candy Mountain.
Blue
(dancing and singing)
Candy Mountain, Candy Mountain, you fill me with sweet sugary goodness.
Pink
Go inside the Candy Mountain cave, Charlie.
Blue Yeah, Charlie, go inside the cave. Magical wonders that will behold when you enter.
Charlie Yeah, uh, thanks, but no thanks. I'm gonna stay out here.
Pink: But you have to enter the Candy Mountain candy cave, Charlie.
Five letters (C, A, N, D, and Y) appear from Candy Mountain and sing and dance.
Y
Oh, when you're down and looking for some cheering up,So, Charlie, please will you go into the cave?
Then just head right on up to the Candy Mountain cave.
When you get inside you'll find yourself a cheery land,
Such a happy and joyful and perky merry land.
They got lollipops and gummy drops and candy things,
It's impossible to wear a frown in Candy Town,
It's the mecca of love in the candy cave. They got jellybeans and coconuts with little hats,
Candy rats, chocolate bats, it's a wonderland of sweets.
Ride the candy train to town and hear the candy band,
Candy bells, it's a treat as they march across the land.
Cherry ribbons stream across the sky into the ground,
Turn around, it astounds, it's the dancing candy tree.
In the candy cave imagination runs so free,
The five letters collide and burst into flames
Charlie All right, fine, I'll go into the freaking candy cave. This had better be good. (Charlie
enters Candy Mountaines )
Blue and Pink
Yeah....
Blue
Goodbye, Charlie.
Pink
Yeah, goodbye, Charlie.
Charlie:
Goodbye, what?
INTERIOR. CANDY MOUNTAIN--DAY. The cave is flooded with darkness
Charlie:
Hey, what's going on here? Hello? Who is that?
MUFFLED sounds are heard to indicate that Charlie is being knocked out.
CUT TO:
EXT. MEADOW -- DAY. Charlie lies on the ground with an incision on his side.
Charlie Ow, God, what happened? (noticed the cut) Oh, they took my frickin' kidney!
OUT TO BLACK
CREDITS
END
